Getting Better

Things  are going on outside these prisons that are beyond our comprehension. The very thought of all that is taking place, out there, beyond here, beyond our ability as prisoners to see them, to hear them, to help resolve them, to be part of them rightfully drives some prisoners mad, but not me, I just close me eyes and lie here on my bunk playing games within my solitary mind.

I don't know you feel about that, I suppose that this could be considered a bad thing, that it could be considered an escape from reality, and of course, you're right. But in my case, I think that a little leeway might be in order, because it is through this escaping of reality that I have finally come to peace with the demon of myself. What I've learned as a a result of this is that I'm deeply moral and value loyalty above all other things, and when I think about the old me this really bugs me, because I know that even then I held these same qualities, yet for some reason I constantly violated them and as result, let my family and friends down. And as a man who values family above all other things, to include God, I am ashamed of this. An old friend tried to help me by telling me to put the guilt of those actions behind me, but I just cant do it, I don't want to act like they never happened. I failed at the game of life and I wont act like I didn't. 

I want people to know that I'm aware of my shortcoming and that today I'm improving myself as best I am able.

Perdurabo. Mayor Mark

 

 

Bastrop, TX 8-16-2026